The trend seems to be growing . . . I mean the number of children people are having these days. For centuries, big families were the norm. Then someone decided that 2 1/2 was plenty. Now I hear more and more of families with 8 kids or sometimes more. Plus, families with children of their own seem to be more willing to adopt. I'd have ten myself, if the husband would go along.

What do you think? How many is enough? And why?

I think 'how many is enough' completely depends on how many you can afford and raise in an appropriate fashion. Other than that, its a personal choice. I would love to have a super-size family, but that's not in the cards for me anymore.

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I think it depends on the family and I agree about how many you can afford. For us 2 is just right and they keep us busy enough. We can give them the attention they need, but for someone else more is definitely better for them and their lifestyle.

A lot depends on the family, the finances and sometimes circumstances you just don't expect. I thought I'd have 3 - 5. After three miscarriages and a high risk pregancy to have my son, followed by a very serious post partum depression, we decided we'd jsut stick with the one and count our blessings.

My husband and I honestly can't put a number on how many children we want. I've had two pregnancies and I honestly think one more is all I could stand to put my body through. I'd like three biological children. I also care for my husband's daughter from a previous marriage. I'd like to think that somewhere down the road we could adopt. We'll have as many children as we feel we're up to and can support.

Which leads me to my next question: Just what is required of support? I've been told that I have to send the kids to camps, let them take whatever lessons they want, and I absolutely have to pay for their college. What do you think?

If I can afford, I would love to have a big family (more than 3 kids). However, due to financial reasons, I am happy with my two children. It might be tiresome to have to raise kids, especially if they are many but there are many advantages to having a big family. One of them is that they don't need to go out to play with other kids as they already have each other together. They can help in the chores, especially when they are older. And when they already have jobs, many can also help the parents, they can even help in sending their younger brothers and sisters to school. When they have their own families, their parents will have lots of grandchildren who bring lots of joy to the whole clan.

In terms of being able to support the children...to me that means having enough food on the table and tuition for private school. Anything beyond that is gravy. I buy used children's clothes and the last thing they need is more toys! I'm not planning on shelling out a lot of money for camps and whatnot. I live in a city where there's lots of affordable and free things to do for children.

I think that would be awesome in a Utopian situation. I have given birth to 3 children (my one daughter passed away) and, while I was originally in a postion to provide for and "afford" a good life with my children, this all changed when my husband and I separated. Granted, I would never have more children (I had difficulties and an emergency c-section with my son), but I think it's difficult to say for sure what monetary position one should be in to raise children.

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As for how many, I originally thought I would love to have two kids. The perfect little family. Now that I have a son I would love to have three or four! My husband isn't crazy about that idea however, since the pregnancies are pretty rough on me overall and he doesn't want anything to happen to me or our potential children.

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Tigriz
Mom to Alex - 1/21/06