jaescafe - please do keep us posted. It wasn't easy to make a decision to not have any more children, so I applaud the courage you've shown. Certianly if you are pregnant, it is an issue I'm sure you will deal with. I don't know whether this is an option for you or not, however i actually chose to have my tubes tied after Abe was born (and I was 26 at the time). If you are not pregnant, it would be a good time to talk seriously with your husband about how to limit the nubmer of pregnancies you have. (As a side note, our regular doctor advised my husband to not get a vasectomy at his age, which was our first choice. It made me realize that the real person deciding to not have any more children was me, and I got my tubes tied. Even with my resolve, my obgyn, a woman, only felt all right about it at my age when she asked my husband if he agreed! Totally illegal, but it made everyone fel better, so I went along with it.)

Well, to update you all I got my period. Don't no why it was so late except I've started a new job and may be a little more stressed than usual. Yes, my hubby and I have talked very seriously about him getting a vasectomy. Maybe by the end of the summer.

Jaescafe - Please let us know how things go. If you are not pregnant and decide that yes, definately, two children is enough for you, stick firm to that. You know ourself better than anyone and what you feel you can handle. After three miscarriages, we were blessed with our son (now 17). My post partum depression was so severe, I knew in my heart I couldn't have another child. At 26, I pushed to have my tubes tied, and our family doctor fought it and my obstetrician actually had my husband tell her it was all right with him! She questioned that at such a "young age" I knew what I was deciding. Trust me - I did and I have never regretted it. I have a wondrful relationship with my son, but have had bouts of depression since - another post partum would have not allowed me to be the mother that I am today.

I'm not normal - my depression came before the birth of my third son. I cried myself to sleep every night for the first five months and didn't want to see or talk to anyone. It didn't help that I was sick to the point of dehydration for the first trimester. I finally managed to snap out of it after the fifth month, but I couldn't imagine going through that and having a new baby.

I sometimes wonder how the woman made it through before drs knew about depression and post partum? I can't image what they must have been through. I am glad that everyone is more educated and us woman don't have to suffer as much anymore.

I'm willing to bet that before (I mean two generations ago) women didn't suffer like we do today. They were usually surrounded with help - sometimes family would come and stay with them to take care of the house and cook and what not. If you had people helping you through on a day to day basis, I think it would be easier. If there was someone to pass the baby to when you HAD to get a nap, you would be able to rest and be ready to go again.

Forgive me, I'm feeling nastolgic for the good ole days this morning. Ah, to have family and community be what it once was.

Melos - Don't let a lack of insurance stop youfrom getting help when you need it. There are great contacts that you can make through your local social services office and in the phone book under depression there will be free resources as well. You'll be amazed at just how much better you feel with just being able to share with others who can say to you "I know how you feel" - takes a tremendous edge off the isolation one can feel with depression.

Sometimes the problem is that you don't want to be around those people - the depression goes to deep. That's when family has to step in. If they know that there's a possible problem then they can be on the watch. It has to be a family thing.

kelkat - you have a great point. There was a lot more cohesiveness of families a couple generations ago and yes, I think it was more natural to have family step in and help out. I think although women worked very hard in the home, there are unique stress factors at hand to day that also add to hte depressive issues women have and part of that is trying to have the career track and still being able to be a full time mom. I just don'w see it as possible - there are just so many hours in a day. Not that having a job is bad, but something has to give.